Browngirl Speaks

Head on over to the new and improved BrownGirl Speaks.

I have been dealing with some major conflicting emotions lately, well…maybe not just lately. I battle the realist lying dormant inside me. I really need the realist to leave me altogether. I know everyone’s all about “keepin’ it real”, but for me, keepin’ it real meant a constant negative attitude and no peace. It’s a struggle to stay on this more positive road.

Most days I feel like I’m right on the cusp of something extraordinarily divine happening for my family. I cherish those moments of feeling so full and overwhelmed. And then there are other moments…

Yesterday, I had a small breakdown. I sobbed almost uncontrollably and it was something so small that set me off. It’s terribly hard to speak in the affirmative on what’s not really there. It’s disheartening to know your head and heart are in the right place, yet you struggle for even a mediocre lifestyle while those only concerned with self and, sometimes, malice thrive. It sucks to know you’ve done the work of ten men and receive no reward, but see those who do nothing have everything handed to them.

But what can you do? As Jill Scott sang: I Keep. I still speak my positive affirmations: I am blessed beyond measure. I have every need met. I have abundant peace. I still celebrate those who have success and good fortune…that actually deserve it. I keep believing that one day I’ll get to celebrate and bask in my own success and good fortune.

Ase

So much going on in my little microcosm these days…

I’m working for The Infinite Field Magazine. It’s a digital spiritual lifestyle magazine. The premiere issue is scheduled for August. Do not miss out on what this magazine has to offer.

I’m working on an African American History/Literature homeschool curriculum. This is a need I see unmet and have a passion for. I also think that my approach will be unique. Stay tuned.

I’m still hustling my tees. Mainly online as I don’t have the capital to pursue booths at conventions and whatnot.

Still homeschooling the kid, of course. Still reading, when I can. I’m always reading, just not always for pleasure.

When I need a break, I can be found on Facebook playing Uno. *wink*

Truessence tagged me.

Total books I own:

currently 213 (not including my son’s library)

Last book I bought:

Go Tell It on the Mountain by James Baldwin

Last book I read:

The Thing Around Your Neck by Chimamanda Adichie

Five books that mean a lot to me:

Their Eyes Were Watching God by Zora Neal Hurston

Like the Singing Coming Off the Drums by Sonia Sanchez

Possessing the Secret of Joy by Alice Walker

She’s Come Undone by Wally Lamb

Let the Lion Eat Straw by Ellease Southerland

I’m supposed to tag others, but all my reader friends have been tagged, so any takers feels free to join in.

Mark your calendars. 7/7/09. Maxwell. BLACKsummersnight. Music has missed you man.  

Check out his new video for "Pretty Wings" here.

*The season finale of Lost was like OMG!!  I am going to suffer major withdrawal until 2010.  And I can’t believe it’s going to be the last season…EVER!  But I am looking forward to the resolution of the best written show in TV history. As I tweeted last night:"As much as I distrust Juliet, I still would have preferred Kate’s ass going down!"

*I am sooo in love with my new hair brush.  Yes, that Denman D4 I mentioned a couple of posts back.  Thanx Teri of tightly curly for the recommendation.  And your whole site is fabulous!  This brush has given me weekly hairgasms for the last 3 weeks.  It makes my curls so oingy boingy and smooth.

 * I’m so glad that we’re doing 3 weeks on and 1 week off as our new homeschooling schedule.  I’m a bit too happy, I think.  That break is coming just in time…every time.  BTW, our basil is growing beautifully and the peppers are growing strong as well.  That basil smells wonderful!

*Congrats to Teyona, America’s Next Top Model.  She definitely deserved it.  I just wish it would have been her and Aminat stomping it out at the end.  Though, no doubt we’ll see her killer bod gracing some catwalks and some high fashion mags.

*Adichie’s latest book, The Thing Around Your Neck, is really good.  I’m about half way through this collection of short stories.  I know, I know…it’s not out yet in the U.S. I couldn’t wait, so I ordered it from The Book Depository.  This UK based book seller just rocks my world.  I should have a review up in a few days.

ciao!

Momversation is holding an amazing contest: Best mom memory wins a coveted spot on their panel!

Here’s what I need you to do: vote for Quel!  She’s the fab mom blogger of HomeGirl.